If you’re considering of making a lasting change in your life, which I know you will it cannot be through fear. People in general do not make a lasting change in their life through fear. Fear In general could be a motivator for some in the beginning, but In order to grow and inspire someone to be their very best you need the correct ingredients for fomenting personal grow.
You need to encourage the individual and foster a warm relationship with them. One of the best things you can do for them is believe in them when no one or even themselves believe in themselves. I have seen marvelous wonders when you tell an individual you believe in them. In a way it sparks life in their eyes, kind words of true inspiration help a person grow.
People in life especially those that come from catastrophic or emotional suffering need the best human treatment you can provide if you want them to grow.
You have to be kind, sensible and most importantly sensitive to their needs. When people feel understood and you’re able to be sensitive to what they are sharing with you In a way the relationship or person begins to grow or improve emotional when they can sense this from you. You have to be as humanly human as possible. Now what this means to you I don’t know, but I am sure you have an idea of what it means.